


august

by mirakeul



Series: take me to the lake where all the poets went to die [7]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: 18+, Angst, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Cussing, Drinking, Drunk Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Female and Male receiving, Multi, NSFW, One Night Stands, Oral Sex, Unrequited Love, tanaka ily but istg, two if the other one counts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 03:48:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28611612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mirakeul/pseuds/mirakeul
Summary: “august sipped away like a bottle of wine ‘cause you were never mine”
Relationships: Shimizu Kiyoko/Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Tanaka Ryuunosuke/Reader
Series: take me to the lake where all the poets went to die [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2096379
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18





	august

**Author's Note:**

> i like pain, thank you

_Salt air, and the rust on your door_   
_I never needed anything more_   
_Whispers of “Are you sure?”_   
_“Never have I ever before"_

You were 16 when you met Ryu. Your first impression of him was that he likes to impress girls, with Noya, they tried to impress you and Kiyoko. When Kiyoko introduced you to the team with her being a second year and you a first-year, you got immediately bombarded with attention. What didn’t surprise you though was how they tend to stick to Kiyoko and not you. It was fine, though, you were used to it.

That didn’t change how you felt about Tanaka, though. You admit, he’s a crackhead but he can be nice at times. He helps you with your problems and he’s with you through everything. You and he were an inseparable pair, even Noya is jealous of your dynamic with his best bro. Tanaka always went out of his way to make sure you were good and after being close to you, he didn’t try flirting with you again. That’s the thing, you liked it though.

One night changed everything. You were out partying with the other second and third years. One sip of alcohol turned into long swigs. You were drunk and dancing with Kiyoko who was tried to stop you but you couldn’t. Not when you feel happier, no. Tanaka, being the gentleman that he is and since he is your closest friend, accompanied you home to your apartment.

You were drunk and with Tanaka just right there, you didn’t think this through. One minute he was just helping you to the bedroom, the next he was under you as you trap him in a heated kiss. Tanaka wasn’t that drunk that night and so he tried pushing you off him.

"Why?” Your voice sounded broken. He was beside you, hair disheveled with some lipstick on his neck. You can’t look at him, almost wanting to cry.

“We’re best friends, Y/N.” He said seriously, he’s never serious and it scared you that it would mean losing him. “Besides, you’re drunk. I don’t want to take advantage of you like that.”

“I’m not!” You shouted, frustrated because you really like him. You look at him, forcing him to look at you as you spoke. “If I told you I want this, will you? Because I do, I like you, Ryu. Please.”

Your voice was pleading as Tanaka gulped down in nervousness. You held his face in your hands as you slowly lean towards him, your lips pursing as you capture his lips in a kiss. Tanaka stiffened as you kissed him, your hands roaming his body before settling around his neck as you pull him closer until no space can be seen between the two of you.

“Please,” You whispered on his ear, gently nibbling it after as he tried to stifle his grunts. You kissed him hungrily, grinding your hips down his lap. He curses under his breath as you grind on his cock as it twitches through his pants especially since you’re wearing a skirt.

“Are you sure?” He whispered as he holds your face, staring into your eyes.

“Never have I ever before.” He quickly swoops in as he kisses your lips. You moan as his hands find your skin underneath your shirt, his hands cold to the touch. You whine as his lips find your neck, nipping and biting at the skin.

You were drunk and high on emotions. Is this really happening? Tanaka’s hands leave ghost marks on your skin as he rubs it, finding your bra. He unclasped it, lifting your shirt as he kisses your nipples. You gasp as his tongue swirls one of your nipples inside his mouth while his hand gropes and flicks the other one.

He switches between the two buds as you buck your hips upward for some kind of friction. He holds your hips in place with one hand as he sucks and bites, leaving purple marks on your skin.

“Fuck, Ryu!” You moaned as you pull him again for a kiss. This time, he responds just as hungrily while fumbling for his pants. You sucked in a breath when he rubbed circles on your hips, kissing just above your skirt. 

“You looked really pretty in that skirt, Y/N.” He said lowly. “Maybe I’ll fuck you while you’re wearing it, huh?”

You moaned in agreement as he reaches through your panties. He rubs you through the material and you’re soaking wet. You buck your hips on his hand, grunting every once in a while. You inhaled sharply when he discards the panties, plunging his finger deep inside you.

_But I can see us lost in the memory  
August slipped away into a moment in time  
‘Cause it was never mine_

“Ryu,” You sensually exclaimed as his finger continued to go inside you. He added another finger as he rubs your clit. Your hands are gripping the bedsheets too hard as he fingers you, your scent intoxicating him.

“Good girl, Y/N. So wet for me.” You whine as he praises you, making you wetter as he spews out sweet words from his mouth. “Can I taste you?”

You eagerly nodded, crying out as he plunged his tongue inside you. You know this was his first time but it didn’t seem like it. He was really good, fuck. The wetness of his tongue combined with the hotness of his mouth drove you insane as you bucked your hips, desperate to cum. You can feel yourself coming as Tanaka plays with your clit and devours you, screaming as you spurt out on his mouth and face. 

He smirked, licking his lips and cleaning his face. “That was good, Y/N.” 

You beamed at his compliments, them making you hornier by the second. He took off his pants, his cock straining against his boxers. You lick your lips in anticipation as he palms his hard-on through the material. Tanaka wasn’t that big but he wasn’t small either. Your mouth waters at the thought of it entering you.

You pulled him towards you, changing your positions so you’re on top, teasingly grinding down his cock. He moaned as you pulled down his boxers, his cock bouncing out of it. Your hands immediately wrap around the base making him grunt. The tip has been spilled with pre-cum and you stare mesmerized as you pump it up and down.

Tanaka is blushing underneath you. This was definitely his first time being intimate with a girl especially with someone who likes him. He thrust into your hands as he drools. You never tried doing a blowjob before but decided to try and please Tanaka. His eyes widen as your mouth takes him in, your mouth hot as you swallow his cock.

You bobbed your head up and down, swirling your tongue as you fondle his balls and grope the base of his cock which your mouth couldn’t reach. His hands find your hair, gripping them as he tries to buck his hips upward. You try not to gag as his cock reaches your throat, him stopping because you looked hurt.

“Are you okay?” He asked worriedly. You raised one of your thumbs up and you continued giving him head. He cursed as you fastened your pace, warning you that he’s close. You didn’t stop until he came, his breath shuddering as cum filled your mouth and some dribbling down your chin.

You swallowed what you could, a bit salty but it was okay. You wiped the sides of your mouth as Tanaka pulled you towards him, his hand gripping your ass. Your tongues are exploring each other’s mouths as you moaned and grind against him. 

_And I can see us twisted in bedsheets  
August sipped away like a bottle of wine  
'Cause you were never mine_

He flipped you over, pushing you to the bed and making you go on all fours. Your chest was heaving as you couldn’t see what he was doing from behind you. He rides up your skirt, rubbing your ass gently. He unrolled a condom, which Noya jokingly gave him, onto his cock. 

He positions his cock underneath your vagina, gripping your hips. “I’m going to put it in. Tell if me if it hurts.” 

You nodded, inhaling sharply as he rubs the tip on your pussy. He kisses your hips, rubbing circles on them to try and distract you from the pain. He puts it in slowly, minding you if you would be in pain. You hissed as his cock enters you, taking a deep breath as you adjust to him. Once you whimpered an “okay”, he continued thrusting it in until everything is inside you.

You moaned because of the contact, your pussy clenching down on him as you swallow him whole. You signaled him that it was okay to move and he slowly did. You gripped the bedsheets, your knuckles turning white as he thrust inside you. Every move makes you cry in pleasure not until he moves his position and thrusts in once more.

“FUCK!” You screamed in pleasure. “Hit that spot once more please.”

He gladly did so, hitting your g-spot with every thrust. You cried and moaned out in pleasure and before you knew it, you were coming. Your cum spilled from your pussy as he fucked you. Your eyes roll at the insane amount of pleasure when he grips your body and lifts you onto his lap.

He sat on the bed with you on his cock. You face the door as he guides your hip up and down his cock. You bounce on him, his hands flicking your nipples and his lips biting your shoulders. Your hands reach above him as you bounce on his cock, deeply impaling yourself on it. 

He bites your neck, sucking on it as he curses under his breath. He grips your hips more as he feels himself coming, his cum filling the condom. He doesn’t stop bouncing you on his cock until you came as well, your head lolling to the side in exhaustion. 

He helped you off him, going to your bathroom to get you some towels to clean you with. Once he comes back, he sees you sprawled on your bed and knocked out. You must’ve been really tired. He chuckled but still cleaned you up, getting you some clean clothes and changing you into it. He got some of his clothes he left last time and cleaned himself as well.

He was about to leave you and just go sleep on the couch in your living room when you held his arm. You were drowsy as you pouted at him. “Stay?”

He sighed, going back to your bed and tucking you in before going in himself. Once he was inside the covers, he stiffened when you cuddled into him, holding him close as you nuzzle his chest. He sighed, patting your head and closing his eyes. You would have a lot to talk about the next morning.  
  
 _Your back beneath the sun  
Wishin’ I could write my name on it  
Will you call when you’re back at school?  
I remember thinkin’ I had you_  
  
You never got to talk about it in the morning. When you woke up, he wasn’t there. There was no note or anything. You didn’t think much of it, shaking your head and preparing yourself to go to school later this afternoon. You were just overthinking things, right?

That afternoon, you biked towards Karasuno as you beamed and thought about last night. You texted Tanaka but he hasn’t answered yet. You biked faster as you sang a bit, wanting to talk to Tanaka when you arrive.

You locked your bike inside, going to the gym when you hear Tanaka and Noya’s voices inside. You smiled and was about to open the gym when you hear your name fall from Noya’s mouth.

“You helped Y/N get home last night, right?” You held your breath, waiting for his answer in bated breaths. 

“Yeah,” A ball can be heard bouncing on the floor. 

“She was pretty drunk when you both left, did something happen?” You can hear the teasing in Noya’s voice. 

“Um,” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion with his answer. “No, nothing. I slept on her couch after I got her home.”

Your smile was wiped off your face when he denied what happened between the two of you. You didn’t see Kiyoko behind you who reached up to tap your shoulder.

“Y/N, are you okay?” She asked you shyly. You turned towards her, your eyes staring at her and her perfect figure.

“I-I’m fine,” You answered after a beat. You smiled to reassure her which didn’t really seem to work.

“Let’s go inside?” You let her open the door, lagging behind her because you know no one would even notice you were there.

“Kiyoko-san!” Tanaka and Nishinoya screamed and greeted Kiyoko. Your eyes travel to Tanaka who didn’t even spare you a glance as they continued to flock Kiyoko. You sighed, putting your bag down the benches and starting on your managerial duties. 

It seems like Tanaka has chosen to forget about last night and even if it hurts, you try. The others arrive just a few minutes after the two of you, greeting you and Kiyoko. You avoided his eyes as he and Noya greet you as well.

“Oh, hey Y/N! How are you?” Noya asked you, teasing you a bit about last night. “You looked pretty wasted last night.”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.” 

You can feel Tanaka looking at you so you said, “I should go to Ukai-san about the, um, practice. Yeah, bye.”

You hurriedly left the duo, something surprising for everyone since they know how close you are to Tanaka and by extension, Noya. Tanaka was shooting you worried glances but decided to just talk to you about it after practice.

_Back when we were still changin’ for the better  
Wanting was enough  
For me, it was enough  
To live for the hope of it all_

He didn’t get the chance to talk to you as it seemed like you were avoiding him. He figured he would just swing by where you were staying so you can talk. He knows you’re alone in that apartment, seeing that your parents are not home in Japan which is why he sometimes sleeps over there. After practice, you sped out before anyone can talk to you, biking away from Karasuno.

He walks to your apartment, his bag hanging by his side as he knocks on your door. He hears a faint “wait” through the door as he shuffled his feet. You open the door, not expecting Tanaka and so your smile dropped.

“Tanaka,” He stiffened, you’ve always called him Ryuu. 

“What are you doing here?” You feigned happiness as you smiled at him. “Do you want to come inside?”

He wordlessly went inside and sat on the couch. You went to the kitchen to get a glass of water for the two of you, a little bit nervous as to why he was here. You came back to the living room, sitting beside him as you hand him the glass which he took silently.

“What’s up?” You asked him after a while of silence.

“You’re seriously asking me that?” You looked incredulously at him. “You’re the one who decided to avoid everyone today.”

“I was in a hurry, what’s it to you?” You answered, avoiding his eyes. Now, he cares?

“What is wrong with you?” He said, holding your shoulders and forcing you to look at him.

“Do you really want to know? I have feelings for you!” Silence ensued as he stared wide-eyed at you. You like him? Was that why you were adamant the night before? You pried off his hands as he stared at you. You looked down as he puts a considerable amount of space between the two of you.

“You’re not going to say anything?” You whispered with tears in your eyes.

“I’m sorry,” You knew it was coming but it didn’t change the fact that it hurt. You cried as he continued. “You know we’re just best friends and I like Kiyoko.”

Kiyoko this, Kiyoko that, it was always Kiyoko and never you. It was hard for Tanaka to hurt you but he had to. He doesn’t want to hurt you longer so he told you the truth. What caught him off guard was you coming close to him, your tears more visible to him. You held his face with him stiffening in front of you.

“One last time, please?” Your voice was desperate as you kissed him. He doesn’t respond at first but you begged once more. “Please? I’ll move on after this.”

You kissed him once more, silently crying as he kissed you back. You know he doesn’t feel anything but you just wanted to feel him. You took a deep breath as he nipped at your skin, the night getting shorter as you continued. He brought you to the bed where you both continued for one last time.

“Can you do something for me?” You whispered before he thrust inside you. “Can you say you love me?”

He stiffened for a bit, nodding shortly after. “I love you, Y/N”

_Canceled plans just in case you’d call  
And say, “Meet me behind the mall”  
So much for summer love and saying “us”_

You were alone after that. Unlike last night, he didn’t stay and left without a word. You’ve done it. No more meetups at the mall and friendly dates with just the two of you. You laughed bitterly, oh how naïve you were to think that you’d have a chance against someone like Kiyoko.

A week has passed and the divide between you and Tanaka grew with the others noticing as well. You didn’t go to Tanaka before the start of practice after that. No more hugs were exchanged as just simple hello’s, sometimes none. You hung out with Ennoshita, Narita, and Kinoshita more, opting to go out of your way to avoid Tanaka. Tanaka did his best to avoid you too, hanging more with Kiyoko and asking her on dates even if she says no. He also chose to talk to Hinata and the other first years more together with Noya.

That was a quiet week for the Karasuno team. Confused looks were thrown everywhere as you both avoid each other and avoided talking about the situation. You were walking to the gym with Ennoshita when you opened the door to the sight of Tanaka hugging Kiyoko. You stopped in your tracks, just staring at them as Ennoshita asked Tanaka what was happening.

“We’re going on a date!” Tanaka was beaming beside Kiyoko who was slightly blushing. You blinked the tears out of your eyes as you smiled at Kiyoko.

“Finally!” You exclaimed, hiding the pain by congratulating them. “I was getting tired of hearing Tanaka and Noya chase after you, Kiyo.”

She blushes even more as Ennoshita texts the group chat. He congratulated them, although unbelieving of the situation. The team arrived after some time, congratulating Tanaka and Kiyoko about the next step of their relationship.

Wow, their relationship. Noya was seen being extra, crying because why didn’t Kiyoko choose him? You were out of it for the afternoon, getting scolded twice by Coach Ukai.

“Are you okay?” Suga asked you after practice. You gave him his water bottle, smiling in response to his question.

“Yep! Never better!” You smiled more, turning to give the next water bottle when you saw Kiyoko who was giving Tanaka his water bottle (you gave him his before) and your heart ached when Tanaka smiled at her. He never smiled at you like that, like he loves you.

“You sure?” You flinched, turning back to Suga. He was looking at you then followed where you were looking. You hung your head low as Suga realized what was happening.

“I’m fine, senpai.” He didn’t look convinced when you looked back up. He pulled you, shouting that he will just help you with something.

Once you were alone, he turned to you and asked, “Now, tell me. Are you okay?”

“Nothing will change if I’m not, so drop it, Suga senpai.” 

“Is it about Tanaka?” You stiffened, gosh you were so obvious. “What happened? We were all surprised last week when you started ignoring each other.”

So you told him. You told him about that night and the day after that. He listened as you told him about your feelings for the boy and how you were rejected. He just listened. After that, he pulled you and embraced you.

“Y/N, you don’t need to hide your pain. We’re here for you, okay?” He said, patting your head. “You don’t even have to tell the others about all this. Just tell them your feelings and maybe we can help you.”

You sighed, content in his arms. He’s always made you feel like you have an older brother. “I know, I know. Thank you senpai.”

_'Cause you weren’t mine to lose  
You weren’t mine to lose, no  
'Cause you were never mine  
Never mine_

The succeeding days, you started being more of your normal self. You reached out to Tanaka at times of practice and although he was surprised, he gladly returned the smiles and the laughs with you. Your heart still aches when you see them together and everything always comes back.

How you both loved hanging out in the mall. How you sometimes pick him up at his house and was the one driving to places. How you both went on late-night drives that first time you cried because of school. How you always canceled your plans just for him just in case he calls you over. How you were so ready to drop everything just for him.

You shook your head, no. You shouldn’t do this to yourself. As much as you liked him, you’re worth everything. You sighed, smiling at the team. They really helped you cope with what you’re feeling, especially Suga. Even though you didn’t get to be with Tanaka, you were still happy for him.

_But do you remember?  
Remember when I pulled up and said “Get in the car”  
And then canceled my plans just in case you’d call?  
Back when I was livin’ for the hope of it all (For the hope of it all)  
For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all  
(For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all)_


End file.
